I’m Catholic, are Jew?
Let me start this topic off with a disclaimer. If you read last weeks post you already know this but if not, my relationship with my fiancé was my first. This means going into it, I was unaware of the so-called taboo subjects and danger zones as they applied to new relationships. That being said, the rule book was out the window with us..no holds barred.
From day one, we started with open and honest communication so my thought was why change [READ] if I’ve got something on my mind you’re gonna hear about it sorry not sorry. <Cue Gabe somewhere rolling his eyes in agreement>. Within hours of our first meeting we “shared” (let it be known I was not a food sharer in the days of yore) a meal (airplane snacks) together during which the jig was inevitably up. As one who’s never been too shy about her faith I bowed my head, said my prayer (aloud), did the sign of the cross and was ready to go to work. It was at that point the flood gates opened.
I let Gabe in on my entire religious background; growing up Catholic, attending Catholic school, and receiving the sacraments. It was then that Gabe let me know that he was Jewish 🤭. My curiosity was peaked...I wanted to know all the things!
Eventually (a week later) this conversation evolved into a question on how we would raise our future children (hey, when you know you know). I thought back to growing up and learning how my friends practiced their faith, even attending their home churches with them. What harm had that done? How had it tarnished my relationship with my faith? IT DIDN’T! In fact, it only strengthened it while also furthering my interest and understanding of others own personal beliefs.
We both arrived at the idea that a collaboration of faiths would be beneficial to our future children; giving them insight into both of our backgrounds and appreciation for different faiths. Alas, I know that there will inevitably people who turn their nose up and gasp at such an idea but for us, it just made sense. Why not incorporate two faith practices in our everyday life.
Not long after I found myself at my first Shabbos and soon after Gabe was at church with me; for all my Jewish peeps out there, you know this is a BIG step. As it was explained to me, it was a wonder he didn’t burst into flames upon crossing the church threshold. However, for us if we were going to do it we didn’t want to do it halfway. I wanted Gabe at church with me so when the children came it wouldn’t be such a huge leap or confusion on their part as to his absence. It was imperative for both of us that we know and be able to impart all the ins and out of his faith so when the inevitable why’s came we would be prepared to impart these sage nuggets of wisdom.
In all, I must say that our differences have only strengthened our bond and understanding of each other while also helping us to cultivate a future rich with diversity and openness; factors I’m hopeful our children will grow to love and appreciate.